Remy's reflections - Priesthood and other updates

The first update of the year, but I’m not here to talk about that. I’m done saying this year’s going to be different. Either I’ll make it different by action, or I won’t.

A great deal has happened over the past few months, as usually happens when you don’t write for some time. I therefore apologize for this post in advance.

First, the Farm documentary “Shining Forth Prosperity” is DONE! I’m so happy it’s over. It was a lot of fun, and I felt like I really accomplished something. Unfortunately since the farm is going through some rather strange times, I’m not sure how much the documentary will really matter in the end. Still, it was nice to finally accomplish it. I had a lot of help with the physical editing of it, but I did much of the sound editing, all the narration, the script and some of the on-screen stuff. Good for the resume.

I recently had the opportunity to perform a baptism in Victoria, which was a unique experience. I prayed I’d do it right the first time, and I did. It pleased me to be able to perform such an ordination.

On the heels of that baptism, I was asked by President Dykes of the Nanaimo High Counsel to give a talk in this month’s stake conference. That was the last thing I expected, and provided me with a chance to truly feel humble. Everyone was certain I could accomplish it, but I was really uncertain. I’ve never been good with reading out loud, and my memorization skills aren’t much better. Despite my fears however I did a reasonable address. I called Chelsea my impatient wife though, which was a complete accident. Poor girl. Luckily everyone got a kick out of it, and knew it was an error. It was a very humbling experience, and I know I couldn’t have done it without the Lord, and the faith of family and friends. I felt like people truly enjoyed my talk, and not because I was blind. I attempted to bring a lot of energy and optimism, which I’m hoping people appreciated. I wasn’t seeking the praise I received, but I was hoping to uplift people. Having so many people comment so positively on my talk came as a pleasant and almost overwhelming surprise.

Finally, after a very long road, I’ve reached the point where I have at last obtained the Melchizedek priesthood. To know I now have the authority to bless my wife and others in their times of need, to administer to the sick, to bless the children not yet born to me … It’s an overwhelming feeling. I feel more … real, if that makes sense, as though there was a part of me which has just been born. There’s no other way I can explain it. Knowing I have the authority to exercise the same power Christ and God themselves possess, so long as I have faith and continue to strive to better myself … To anyone who has never heard of this, who thinks “it’s arrogant to even consider yourself on the same level as Jesus” … I guess they wouldn’t really understand this. It’s not so much that I have that power. I can’t will anything to be, and watch as it becomes. But I have the ability now to speak with the will of the Father and the Son in matters of great worth to those whom I speak to in a blessing. Their words are my words, and their will is imparted to their children through me. I am in essence a conduit. An odd concept to anyone who isn’t LDS I suppose, but in the right hands, the priesthood can manifest true miracles. I have witnessed a few of these first hand in my own life, and have heard accounts of many more.

Only the impending move, and my new-found unemployment weigh on my shoulders these days. During the blessing I received when being given the Melchizedek priesthood, I was told that I shall find employment. SO, I just need to keep faith that it will happen and do what I can to find it. As for the move … well … I don’t know how I feel about that. It’s a big step, and a lot of work for something I wish I had more faith in. Fresh starts are well and good, but having no prospects yet, no decent way to find a place to live … it’s not the most pleasant feeling. Perhaps in time I’ll feel better about all of this. I know it’s very important to Chelsea that we move. In truth there is little keeping me here. Even many of the friends I once had have faded from my life, or drop in and out of it in sporadic bursts of friendship and anger. So in the end, I’m left with little here, as even my family is far away already. No matter what though, I will have Chelsea by my side. And that is a blessing I will always be grateful for.